I'm all for airport security and the steps passengers have to put up with because of the idiots that roam this world and think they need to kill as many people as they can. There comes a point, though, when it sometimes gets hard to figure out just who the idiots are.
I had an episode this morning which at first amused me. I thought: Oh good, something interesting to share on my blog. (You think along these lines when your life runs in the slow lane most of the time) Anyhow, here's how I looked as I checked out of our hotel this morning and was sitting outside waiting for the shuttle bus to deliver us to the airport.
Well, apparently I look like that to airport security. They obviously have these little games they play to make their day more entertaining. I had on no jewelry, no shoes, went through the x-ray machine, and then when they rubbed a little blue pad on my hands---I was pulled out of the line to undergo a more extensive pat down.
Jenni immediately got on the phone to call her sister so they could laugh their heads off. And I was kind of laughing too. I was taken by two ladies to this telephone booth size box off to the left. It had windows but you couldn't see through them. Inside, the women put on gloves again, made me stand with my legs apart, and proceeded to pat me up one side and down the other. And then they went over the breasts and along the crotch. Then my hands and clothes were rubbed with a blue pad again and the security officer had her hands put under the fancy wancy light as well. Apparently they had to check and see if the stuff on my hands was dangerous chemicals designed to bring down a plane.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!"
Snot-nosed punks! Who do they think they are pushing old fat ladies around?! I think it's a form of bullying. I wasn't intimidated in the least but I can bet if they have a habit of pulling elderly women (or men) out of the line for this inspection, sooner or later they're gonna get somebody who is scared and frail and could be caused emotional anxiety.
And you know what the "alarm" was that made them decide I was a threat? My hand lotion. Their little blue pads couldn't detect what perfume it was. Hell! It was probably something I picked up at Wal-Mart for crying out loud!
Jenni and I laughed about it afterwards but as I dealt with long lines that moved like molasses, airplane seats that weren't comfortable, stale pretzels for a snack, four babies that cried nonstop through the flight, and cramped legs when I tried to get up....all of a sudden, I wasn't amused anymore. I was pissed off!
No wonder a lot of the people around the world don't like us. We've got a multitude of dingbats at the top making rules that are just plain dumb!! We have a lot of things right in this country but we sure as hell don't get an A for common sense. Last week I saw a news story on TV about how they were going to stop searching little kids. Who are these people who think we needed to scan kids in the first place? Have they never spent time at an airport and people watched?
And if this rant puts me on "a special secret list" of those citizens who need to be watched....SO BE IT! I can live with that.
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